Casting Call

As you may or may not know, I tore the TFCC ligament in my wrist and have been in a cast from my hand to almost my armpit for a week. I'll be in this cast for two more weeks and then I get two more weeks in a shorter cast. The goal is that being immobile for 5 weeks will allow it to heal on its own so I can try to avoid having a 4th surgery on this wrist. (I've already had 2 ganglion cysts removed and 1 carpal tunnel surgery). Fingers crossed!

For those who have never been in a cast or for those of you who have forgotten what it's like and would like to relive the fun, I thought I'd share what I've learned about cast life in the first week...

  • They're fucking itchy. I've used all of the meditation techniques I know and none of them can scratch the itch I get on my forearm at least twice a day.
  • While their purpose is to help heal, it feels like it's causing additional damage. Casts should be clear (so I can see if things are bruising or if spiders crawled in while I slept) and ventilated (for fresh air and itch holes). 
  • They leave your thumb quite vulnerable. The first day in the cast, I tried to pick Roxy up (I know... bad idea but whatever... I thought I could do it!) and thought for sure I broke my thumb. It healed though. Phew. That would have been awkward.
  • While driving, all I have to do is lift my arm to use my turn signal. I kinda like it... it makes me feel like an autonomous robot.
  • Seriously though... they're fucking itchy.
  • Though the person who put the cast on gave me extra elbow padding, it has already been reduced to what I'm sure is the width of a cheap tissue. When I rest my elbow, it digs into the cast and my fingers tingle.

I can't decide which is more fun to say - "itch hole" or "fingers tingle"... anyway...

  • I can scratch my nose with my thumb, but I cannot reach any other fingers to my face. It's a nail biter's torture device.
  • Finding a comfortable sleeping position is impossible. I'm surrounded by a sea of pillows. Poor CDG. At least we're in a full bed and not a twin... right?  
  • Have I mentioned the itchiness?
  • I cannot —so Chantelle has to help me— put my contacts in, close my contact lens case, shave my right armpit, apply deodorant to my right armpit, tie my shoes, wash dishes, shower, wash my hair, dry my hair, or hold the dog. I'm basically a well-behaved toddler. Go ahead, get your jokes out... I'll wait... ("How is that any different than before your cast") 

.............I know you all... you need more time.............

  • I cannot type or text quickly. And I hit CAPS instead of shift constantly. At work, I've been given Dragon®/Nuance® speech recognition software, but it takes some time for it to learn how you speak.
    • Day 1...
      • Me: Let's set up a meeting.
      • Software: Ice cream blue pencil yes.
  • As far as typing at home or texting, I rely heavily on Siri. I've been typing this post for what feels like 3 months in comparison to my standard wpm. If I haven't responded to you yet, I'm sorry, it's bugging me, but I promise I will. I'm chipping away at my texts, emails, and Facebook messages.

And swearing. A lot.

Thanks to all who have sent well wishes and healing thoughts... I feel them and love you back.